Next month, Beaverton resident Kim Case will take a second chance on love: remarrying her ex-husband, David Wanecke. The two were married for 23 years and have three children together, but were divorced for nearly 13 years. The two remained friends over the years, though, and he re-proposed to her on New Year’s Eve.
But while she’s ecstatic about their reunion, part of her is heartbroken, too. She must find a new home for Sassy and Eddy, the two cats who have been her faithful companions during all that time alone.
Wanecke’s allergies, which have always been bad, have worsened over the years. His eyes water up and he sneezes relentlessly, no matter how much vacuuming she does.
He hasn’t pressured her to give up the cats, but Case could see that if she wanted the relationship to move forward, her conundrum was all too clear.
“Believe me, I thought about it long and hard,” she says. “And I finally thought, ‘am I willing to lose the love of my life?’ ”
Case concluded that no, she wasn’t – not again.
Case and Wanecke first met at a Beaverton apartment complex in the 1970s.
“He asked me out for a date on the back of a matchbook,” recalls Case, who does marketing for retirement and assisted living communities.
They got married on May 20, 1977.
But the stresses of maintaining a marriage, balancing careers and confronting opposite parenting styles as they raised their three children proved too much. Both agree they grew apart.
When they divorced about 13 years ago, “We did agree early on that we weren’t going to make it a messy divorce,” says Wanecke, now retired after a 35-year career in medical sales.
They maintained a friendship, often spending holidays together with their kids. Case even helped her ex-husband write his Match.com profile.
“You kiss a few toads,” Case says. “That ‘kissing toads’ thing really can make you sit up and take notice of what’s really important.”
She ultimately turned to fellowship from felines.
She found Sassy, now 10, as a sickly kitten in a pet store and nursed her to health with a baby bottle. Eddy, six, came from Bonnie L. Hays Small Animal Shelter.
“They just walked with me through really tough times and through really happy times,” Case says, “and they were just always there loving me.”
But her relationship with Wanecke deepened, and the two began spending more and more time together.
“We’re more compatible right now,” Wanecke says. “We have a lot in common.”
The two both love spending time with their three grandkids, and Case especially enjoys seeing her ex-husband embrace his role as a grandfather.
The only thing they can’t come together on is the cats.
Wanecke offered to wait. But waiting would mean putting their renewed relationship on hold. Case is eager to get married and share a home together again.
She thought she’d figured out her cat conundrum several months ago, when a close friend’s husband called to say he wanted to surprise his wife with Eddy and Sassy. Case was thrilled. But then the friend decided she wanted to choose her own cats.
So she explored all the options she could think of. Her daughter posted her mother’s dilemma online to her hundreds of Facebook friends, and asked those friends to share her story too.
Case wrote to everyone in her e-mail contact list. She went to her veterinary clinic and a pet store. Her daughter re-sent the Facebook appeal. No takers. The shelters she called all declined.
Case’s dilemma is sadly all too common, says Kathy Covey, public relations manager for Cat Adoption Team, one of the shelters Case says she approached.
Portland-area shelters are frequently flooded with felines; Covey says her organization can get 20 calls just like Case’s each day.
It’s not that shelters don’t want to help, Covey says.
“We have finite space,” she says. “Every animal shelter has to come up with the best possible formula so that they can help the most animals, while not causing the shelter to be full of hard-to-place animals.”
Finding homes for older cats is especially difficult, as reported in a recent Pet Talk column.
Senior cats don’t do well in shelters because they quickly become depressed, which can lead to behavior issues or higher susceptibility to illness.
Rather than a shelter, Covey suggests finding a new adopter by dialing into your social network or advertising – prudently – online, using adoption guidelines provided by a shelter such as CAT.
That way, you’ll have the chance to find out about the person’s family situation, obtain a veterinary referral, make a home visit and ask questions to make sure your pet is going to the best possible home.
The clock is ticking, but Case hopes to have the chance to do just that. She’s still searching for a potential adopter who can offer an indoor home and a lot of love to give. A fenced-in yard wouldn’t hurt, either.
She says her cats may be middle-aged, but they are well-adjusted and don’t have any major health issues.
Eddy is “just a big love,” she says, and is most at home by her side.
Sassy is shy but also loving. She loves being petted and enjoys playing with her fishing-pole toy. And they both love their catnip.
“They still like to play, even though they sure get tired a lot easier,” Case says. “Other than that they’ll just want to curl up next to you and be petted or purred.”
With Valentine’s Day right around the corner, perhaps there’s room in your life for these two furry companions. If you’re interested in adopting Eddy and Sassy, e-mail Kim Case at .
If you need to re-home a cat:
- Ask friends and family members if they want a cat or know someone who might
- Ask your social network
- Create a flyer to post on community boards, veterinary clinics and pet supply stores
- Advertise on Craig’s List, pet-friendly sites or newspaper classifieds
- Don’t be afraid to charge a fee
- Ask questions of the potential adopter
- Require a driver’s license or other form of identification
- Make sure your cat is current on all vaccinations and properly groomed
Find out more information here.
The Filipino people is in the middle of a political circus produced and directed by no less than Malacañang itself.
The Irish Times – Friday, January 27, 2012
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